Most emotional moments in Becca’s life could be blamed on three words: Are you ok? It seemed that whenever she was getting dow, whenever she was standing on the edge of a mental breakdown, someone would ask her that little question and she would lose it like there was some tear-coaxing magnet in the phrase. And so, when her Spanish teacher turned to her during class on a particularly difficult day and said,
“Rebecca, no habla mucho hoy? Por que? Estas Bien?” she was completely unable to hold it together. Stacked hours and days of constant language immersion, subject immersion and culture immersion will do that to a person.
First she shrugged, knowing she wouldn’t be able to speak, then, the unavoidable tears started to come and she shook her head. She didn’t cry in classes typically, but the Peace Corps was a different animal.
“Esta bien, en mi casa, tengo dias malos tambien, esta bien. Es dificil,” Claudia said and tried to move on.
“Becca, could you find that advil for me, my head is really hurting,” Amanda broke in and Becca nodded quickly, happy for the excuse for escape. Amanda followed her into her room and though Becca tried to search for the advil and ignore the issue at hand, Amanda refused to allow it.
“Come here,” she said and Becca obliged. Amanda hugged her tightly.
“I know,” she said. Becca nodded but she continued. “No, like I really know. I cried all of last night.” They stood like that for a long time, Becca feeling foolish but also relieved and Amanda without hesitation or judgement. Eventually, they broke apart and Amanda told her to look for the advil (which to be fair, Amanda really did need) and come out when she felt better, Becca couldn’t have thanked her enough for that.
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